I don't know, I identified pretty hard with Mimi from Rent (and then from La Boheme because vocal student) when I was 16. I do think we forget that teens often love and identify with a lot of stuff that we might find "too mature" for them.
I actually identified with Gilda and Senta the most as a teenager, both of which might be used as the most horrifying examples when it comes to the case of so called misogyny in opera.
But as I said, only with the feelings and emotions, without necessarily wanting to replicate their actual actions.
I just understood how it feels when you love a bad guy, or even a good guy but one that doesn't love you back, so much that you would sacrifice yourself for them.
Would I actually do it? No way! Never had any suicidal tendencies whatsoever and when I eventually did find myself once in a relationship with a guy who seemed nice in the beginning but started showing jealous and controlling tendencies later, I simply walked away from the relationship.
Yet I still love both these characters very much and see no conflict in that.
Speaking of #metoo and opera though: https://www.economist.com/prospero/2018/01/22/operas-awful-role-models-and-the-metoo-moment
This might be what 4everchan was talking about, but the way it is presented in this article is very simplified and one-sided, and I don't agree this is an accurate depiction of opera female characters in general, for reasons I already explained.